Holy narcissistic, delusional asshole, Batman!
The first thing I did was check the date to see if this was in fact created recently, as the rhetoric--or, more accurately, verbal venom--didn't feel very 2015-esque. It was. Next I looked to see if this was a spoof of some kind. It wasn't. Then I went to comment on the video on this not-so-much-a-friend-as-high-school-acquaintance's Facebook wall, and my hideously cracked-manicured finger (3 week old baby, hello!) froze above the touchscreen. He--who shall remain unnamed--did not post this video as a hey, check out this asshole. No, he agreed with her.
So, in my first free-ish moment since I saw the video a week or so ago (thanks to my hands-free pumping bra), I decided to share my own response to @NicoleArbour, which I lovingly call Dear Self- Important Assholes.
I should start by saying I've never been overweight. Sure, my weight has fluctuated within a twenty or so pound range--excluding pregnancies--but I have always been relatively thin. It runs in my family. As a child I was lanky, and my twin brother was so skinny he earned the nickname "Bones", and by the time he hit high school, became vaguely obsessed with a dietary supplement called Weight Gainer 2000 and spent enough time in the weight room at the gym that he began to resemble a Jersey Shore character. But just because I was usually pretty thin, it doesn't mean that when I did put on some weight it didn't take an emotional toll.
I used to think that girls are just mean. Then that kids were just mean. But at thirty something, I've gathered the wisdom that it's just people. People are mean. Not all people, mind you, but a lot of people. And Nicole Arbour, You. Are. Just. Mean.
Fat shaming IS A THING. Not only is it a thing, but it is, in fact, a part of an even larger thing called body shaming. Overweight people are not the only ones being teased or ridiculed for their weight. I've been accused of being anorexic or bulimic--which I have never been--just because I was thin. In fact, several of these people who made such comments believed they were actually paying me a compliment. Newsflash--accusing someone of having a dangerous and debilitating disease? Not a compliment. On the contrary, I have had friends--and I'll use that term loosely in this context--particularly in high school, who were all too quick and thrilled to point out if I did gain a few pounds.
But it isn't only weight. Some of the body-related things I've been teased about? Hair (both head and body), Sweat, My big feet, My nails (which I chewed down to the cuticle until mid-high school), Skin, Teeth, Cellulite (even at my thinnest).
Shaming Vs. Discriminating.
These words are not interchangeable, they do not mean the same thing, and while they have different implications, neither are okay. Let me play a little dictionary.com for Miss Arbour, who claims not to be "slow in the brain" (debatable)--though she is decidedly slow in the heart.
1. a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.
humiliation, mortification, chagrin, ignominy, embarrassment, indignity, discomfort
To say that there is no "fat card" in the sense that people who suffer from obesity do not face discrimination is false, but that isn't the point. While I agree that the fact that our world has not been built for them is not inherently discriminatory, there are many more opportunities out there for discriminatory behavior, I assure you. But that is not the point. We are talking about Fat Shaming (see definition of shaming above).
Exhibit A- *points to your video, raises eyebrows, gives censuring look.
Surely if you were not, in fact, slow in the brain, you would understand the difference between discriminating against a group of people and shaming a person. You say you are not talking about those with legitimate medical reasons for their weight. Who the hell are you, Dr. Arbour?
Hypothyroidism, insulin resistance, polycystic ovary syndrome, Cushing's syndrome, leptin deficiency, depression, antidepressants (yes, both the disease and the treatment can cause obesity), medications for seizures, diabetes, hormones, corticosteroids, high blood pressure, antihistamines.
These are all potential causes of obesity. Who the hell are you to compare these people to Frankenstein? And how do you not understand that doing so is the very definition of shaming?
You, Nicole Arbour, should be ashamed.
What I actually find most offensive is the implication that you are coming from a place of concern. The idea that you can "shame" someone into getting healthy is both self-important and ridiculous. Do you honestly believe that someone suffering from obesity is unaware of it? That he doesn't feel badly enough already? That she hears some skinny bitch call her Frankenstein and is suddenly hit with an epiphany of motivation to get fit? If you do, you are an idiot. All you succeed in doing is compounding the problem. Someone is eating their feelings? Well let's give them some more shitty feelings! Genius.
And then, in the eleventh hour, you refer to your video as "satire". Now I can't be sure if you simply don't understand the word or if it's just a lame defense, but it sure as hell excuses nothing. Just as sure as the measure of being an asshole is not simply whether or not one is willing to switch seats on an airplane with someone who may or may not be disabled.
Now, feel free to play the Asshole Card.